I've been an average boy this year, which is not to say that I've been bad, or good; I've been average. To consistently BE average, clearly I will have been bad, good and spent a lot of time just above and just below the measuring line, but I think if you use a full 12 months of data, correcting for seasonal changes, trips to Las Vegas and the intrinsic bias involved in measurement of shouting, crying and pouting I'm a solid _not_ bad.
While I've been pursuing my standard regimen, balancing the occasional perfectly justifiable minor incendiary or explosive event with helping ducklings across a busy street - something has come along to help me stay on the "good" side of the line.
And that something, dear Santa, is perspective. This year, I’ve come to understand that actions, whether good or bad, don’t exist in a vacuum. Helping those ducklings wasn’t just about the ducks—it was about the people who helpfully slammed on their brakes and ended up in the doughnut shop. Likewise, the minor incendiary incidents, though dramatic, taught me about using more reliable detonators (and, admittedly, fire safety). I’d like to think that my average behavior has nudged the world slightly more toward joy than chaos, but hey, averages are tricksy math stuff, so just take my word for it, solid nice list material. Mostly.
So, Santa, as you consider my case, I ask not for judgment but for understanding. Life is messy, full of highs and lows, and through it all, while I appreciate your need for constant surveilance and judgmental list making, I feel like my clear intent is to exceed neutral, and very likely tip right over into nice. If for no other reason than the matter of intent, vs outcomes which are sometimes admittedly problematic.
I ask you find it in your heart to look past the occasional (and purely theoretical) "hacking" of adversarial "nation states" to change the Chairman's published Instagram handle to "DooDooHead" along with a supporting stream of Angry Cat Meme photos, and grant my Christmas Gift Wish List. In that case, I humblely supply this modest list:
- 48 Tesla H100 80GB PCIe HBM2e with appropriate chassis and power supplies
- Water cooling systems for said GPUs
- A ground loop cooling system for the water used the water cooling system
- A version of whatever powers your sleigh to get around to every home on earth in one night without causing the earth to melt (with power adaptors for the sweet GPU rig)
- A reindeer. Doesn't have to be one of the well known ones, you must have hundreds, I just want a well trained one that can chase all of the regular deer away from my garden and -- you know -- fly around at speeds exceeding light
A modest list I think, but some of it might take the elves extrat time and clean room facilities to make, so trying to allow for extra time here.
Sincerely
WeaselChicken
P..S. That's a nice Instagram account you've got there Santa, if you know what I mean...
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